Contents:
- Medical Video: How To Make Him Worry About Losing You - 5 Steps
- Possessiveness is different from darling
- What makes someone possessive?
- 1. Comfort when in control
- 2. Excessively dependent
- 3. Hidden fear
- 4. Lack of trust
- How do you get rid of possessiveness?
- 1. Don't obey emotions
- 2. Browse your past
- 3. Record the triggers of your possessiveness
Medical Video: How To Make Him Worry About Losing You - 5 Steps
Are you a possessive couple? According to the Big Indonesian Dictionary, possessiveness is the nature that feels to be the owner. Naturally, if in a relationship, you and your partner both feel ownership. But if this sense of belonging is excessive so you feel you have the right to regulate his life, this is what is called possessiveness.
Excessive possessiveness will reduce intimacy in the relationship itself, and instead build an unhealthy relationship. How do you overcome this too possessive nature of relationships?
Possessiveness is different from darling
Usually, in relation, you have the feeling of having this by giving total attention and affection to your partner. Giving attention and affection you usually show by maintaining and protecting your partner.
This effort is actually good, but when you have excessive possessiveness, the care and protection you provide will instead curb your partner, blocking your partner from interacting with others, even making it difficult for your partner to do something without your permission. You also tend to control your partner.
What makes someone possessive?
Some conditions that might be the cause of possessive character in you, could be like:
1. Comfort when in control
The ability to control others gives you a feeling of security, because you have the power to keep everything stable. But this convenience can cause addiction, so you continue to want to be the controller. When in fact, this character can actually mean a lack of confidence in yourself.
2. Excessively dependent
Relying too much on your partner to spend too much time worrying and thinking about him will shape you into a possessive boyfriend. You can try to divert your mind by spending time with a friend to overcome this trigger.
3. Hidden fear
The fear hidden in your mind can trigger your possessive character. The loss of someone in the past that makes you no longer want to lose someone you love today, for example.
4. Lack of trust
Lack of trust in a relationship will trigger possessiveness. You might even be jealous easily for no apparent reason for your partner. Though trust and compassion should be two things that are interconnected.
How do you get rid of possessiveness?
Possessiveness will not make your relationship lasting, it might even make the couple want to "escape" from your restraints. Too managing your partner's life and making lots of restrictions can make him feel that you don't believe him. Finally, what is gained is not a lasting and happy relationship, but a relationship full of terror (from the partner's side) and worries and jealousy (from your side), which is certainly not the type of relationship you want.
How do you get rid of this possessiveness?
1. Don't obey emotions
When triggering your possessiveness is in control and successfully influences your emotions, for example jealousy, you should take a break and understand what is happening within you. Acting rashly by obeying the possessive side of you will actually hurt the feelings of those you care about.
By taking this pause, you can deepen the character you have. You can also do meditation to calm your negative thoughts.
2. Browse your past
Some people say that the past is learning. Tracing your past can help you find the trigger for your possessiveness. Maybe in the past an ex has left you because of getting a new boyfriend from a matchmaking application, so you are very limiting your current partner in using social media.
When you find the trigger, communicating it with your partner might help him better understand you.
3. Record the triggers of your possessiveness
By knowing and understanding your possessive triggers, you will more quickly detect their appearance. So, when this possessive nature arises in you, you will find it easier to realize it and be able to fight it. That way, slowly you will be able to reduce its appearance.
Writing it down in a notebook every time you realize what triggers your possessiveness can be done to help you document it.
