Medical Video: How to overcome Shyness and increase Confidence? | Video in Hindi by Him-eesh
When you and your partner have had a long relationship, there will be a time when you begin to doubt your relationship. Whether it's doubting the sincerity of the couple, or doubt about where this relationship will be brought. It's natural to occasionally feel doubtful about your partner, even though you believe you really love him.
However, that does not mean the doubt must be left to undermine your mind. Concealed doubts, fears, and insecurities themselves can threaten the harmony of your two relationships. Even according to Gail Grace, LCSW., An American household therapist, these doubts can also damage your personal life. Before discussing it frankly with your partner, it's good to ask these three things first to yourself.
When you begin to feel doubtful about your partner, ask yourself this first
Maybe now you are feeling doubtful about your partner and believe there is something wrong in your relationship, even though you don't know the exact reason. However, try to take a little time to reflect.
1. Does anxiety only focus on your current relationship, or come from another source?
If you have never felt this worried during your previous relationships, find out why the current relationship can cause this. Maybe, you feel that your current partner's attitude is not so serious or hard to believe. It may also be a concern and worry arises because your relationship is still as long as corn, so it takes more time to get to know each individual inside and out.
However, if the doubts and anxieties continue to emerge even since the first relationship, the problem may be with yourself. For example, you are the type of person who wants to be nurtured or cared for by others. Well, when your partner is an indifferent person, it is not impossible that you feel doubtful and insecure during the relationship because you feel unattended.
Or maybe the opposite: You are a person who tends to dominate relationships and feel that your partner is now more difficult to control than the previous partner. This "rebellious" partner makes you feel doubtful and anxious about your position in the relationship.
Once you understand the source of your anxiety, you will be better prepared to deal with the problem. Explain how you feel about these doubts to compromise together to find a better solution.
2. How do you feel about your partner?
Try asking yourself: what do you feel when you are near a partner, and according to you personally, what kind of partner are you? For example, do you like the way he treats you, or do you feel comfortable every time you chat with him, or rather you feel something strange when you see him hanging out in everyday life.
If your answer to both contains a negative impression, ask yourself again: is that really what you feel sincerely, or just because you are blinded for a moment? Try to be really objective in thinking about the answer.
If you have found the answer, then ask yourself if you can accept your partner with all the advantages and disadvantages he has. Consider carefully whether the things that have disturbed your mind so far and become the cause of your doubts can still be resolved or just the opposite?
3. Do you and your partner express your love in a different way?
Everyone has their own way of expressing their love for their partner. Even so, this can invite doubt.
For example, you show your love by routinely sending a message "I love you" every morning before leaving for work and before going to bed at night. Meanwhile, your partner actually expresses his love through subtle actions (which you might miss sometimes) without speaking. When you send the message, you certainly expect a similar reply, but your partner considers it too haggard, so that it might be rewarded as a mere "U too" or even no reply at all.
This can foster doubts in you about the sincerity of your partner "He loves me no, anyway? "Whose edges could end in a fierce fight - even though it's not necessary. Different languages of love are not a problem. You just need to understand each other that everyone has their own special way of expressing love. Everything returns to you whether you can accept it or not.
When you succeed in finding out what causes you to feel doubtful about your partner, you can consider what steps you will take: Do you continue by making changes (both on yourself, your partner, and also on the relationship) or end it with all the careful consideration You both discussed.