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Medical Video: First Time Tips
Having sex on the first night can be a fun and exciting experience if you don't know where to start. Or maybe you just want to know how to have sex?
To satisfy your curiosity while helping to get rid of your anxiety, we have compiled a step-by-step guide that you must know before, during, and after sex for the first time.
Note: This article prioritizes vaginal penetrative sex, which is sex where the penis enters the vagina. Other types of sex, such as anal or oral, are not specifically mentioned in this article, although some important points can still be applied to various ways of having sex.
A complete guide to how to first have sex
Unlike what you often watch on a glass screen, the way to have sex is not just to take off your clothes and go in and out straight. Like a story, there must be a harmonious development of the path from stimulation to the climax for essential sexual satisfaction.
Here's a guide to how to have good and true sex.
1. Make sure your partner wants to have sex
Approval is the first and very important step if you want to have a good love experience. The agreement here means not just "likes and likes" but also must "want to be the same".
That is, both parties must agree and want to be involved in sexual intercourse consciously. If one party feels uncomfortable, no mood, don't want to have sex at that time, don't continue.
Not only will this splatter the quarrel between the two of you, but sex based on coercion or without consent may lead to serious criminal offenses.
2. Always ready for condoms
If this is an opportunity for your first casual sex or with a new partner, always make sure you or he has a condom deposit in order to prevent transmission of sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies.
One good way to make sure is to immediately ask if they have a condom. If not, talk to yourself about the risks of unprotected sex that you can both face. You can also buy a new condom first before starting.
If this is your first night and your partner's marriage, condoms can be the right contraception if you don't plan to have children immediately (especially if the woman does not have other birth control methods).
3. Heating is important
Sex is an intimate activity. Therefore, try not to hurry. Warming aka foreplay is as important as sex itself.Foreplay also helps strengthen the inner bond for both parties.
In addition to giving time for you and your partner to both relax and enjoy the process, foreplay also helps you avoid pain during sex. If a woman is not sexually aroused enough, her vagina will not be wet enough so that penis penetration will be difficult and painful.
Warming can be done by caressing, touching, or kissing. Foreplay can also be achieved through oral sex, such as blowjob or clitoral stimulation using the tongue. Spend at least 15 minutes to spoil through foreplay before moving to the "main menu".
4. Slow penetration
The easiest and most common way to have sex is with the missionary position, where the woman lies on her back with her knees slightly bent and the man is right above her for penetration (inserting the penis into the vaginal opening).
The penis that gets lost and enters the hole is a "blunder" most often occurs especially if this is the first time the man has penetrated. This is natural, but a penis that is misdirected can cause injury during sex both for men and women.
Therefore, the best way for successful penetration without embarrassing incidents is to ask for a guide. Women can use their hands to separate the labia aka lips in the vagina and use other hands to guide the penis until it enters correctly.
Once the penis enters, the man can continue penetration by pushing the hips slowly and rhythmically until the penis enters fully into the vagina. Then pull out partially before re-entering. Don't force the penis into with a hit motion like in porn. Start with slow and gentle movements until you both find the right rhythm.
5. Take a deep breath
First sex can make you anxious and nervous, but it shouldn't be very painful.
The way to work around this is to relax your mind while setting your breath slowly while the man starts penetration. The person can also participate in doing this to control the penetration rhythm. Take a breath from the nose and exhale slowly through the mouth in a matter of 10 until the penis finally enters.
If the pain is overwhelming or the bleeding is a lot like menstruation, stop the penetration immediately. If you experience pain during sex, maybe this is because you are not wet enough, lack lubrication, need to change positions, or ask your partner to slow down. Pain can also come from anxiety and nervousness.
Talk to your partner about how to make sex more comfortable. Consult with a doctor for more details.
6. Enjoy the moment
Orgasms are always seen as the ultimate goal aka the goal of having sex. Very good if you can immediately experience it on the first night, but know that it is very possible and very reasonable if one party does not orgasm at all. Especially if this is the first sex for women.
On the other hand, men are also very possible and very natural to experience premature ejaculation or difficult erections on their first night. These two issues can be influenced by psychological matters such as nervousness and anxiety, or vice versa, even very excited.
Don't make it difficult to orgasm (or orgasm too fast) as a big problem. Again, this is normal and not a sign that something is wrong with you both. Orgasm is a very unique experience along with personal understanding of each other's body, and it really takes time to master it.
Enjoy this intimate moment along with all the processes. Don't just rush into penetration for the sake of pursuing orgasm and then cleaning up. Sex is the right moment to pamper one another. After it's completely finished, spend time on afterplay for example by hugging or spoiled golers together.
7. Remove the condom
If you use a condom, remove it away from the vagina. The way is not to be careless so that the semen stored in it does not leak out. If this happens, there is a large risk of transmission of venereal disease or unwanted pregnancy.
When you want to pull the penis out of the vagina, hold and hold the base of the condom (the rubber circle) so that the condom does not slip down before you are ready to take it off. This method prevents semen from spilling in the vagina. After the penis is far from the vagina, then pinch the condom openings with two fingers and tie the knot.
Make sure you dispose of the condom properly. After being tied, wrap it in plastic or tissue and throw it into the trash.
8. Clean up
Cleansing after sex is an obligation. About 80 percent of women contract urinary tract infections (UTI) after having unprotected sex.
The way to avoid it is easy. Bathe and clean the genitals properly. For women: wash and rinse your vagina and vulva thoroughly (do not douche!) While men must wash the penis after removing the condom.
Don't forget to wash your hands and urinate immediately after sex. Urine will drain all kinds of bacteria out of the body to clear the urinary tract.
