Continuous Dating? Maybe Your Sign Has OCD

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Medical Video: Howie Mandel Talks About Living With OCD | 20/20 | ABC News

In the twists and turns of dating, there will surely come a moment where we are occasionally approached with doubts about our relationship with him. Are you really happy to live with it? Do you really love him? Does he really love you?Or, are you and the boyfriend the type of couple who likes to break up?

To a certain extent, all of this is a natural thing and usually will only be fleeting, not prominent enough to be taken seriously. However, for people with obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), their doubts and fears can greatly obscure reality, causing them to become obsessed with continuing to question whether their partners are appropriate for themselves or if they are truly lifelong soul mates that God sent for him.

Are you one of them?

Get to know obsessive compulsive disorders in dating relationships

Aka obsessive compulsive disorder OCD is a mental disorder that causes a person to have an obsession that originates from certain thoughts, feelings, ideas, or sensations that trigger them to do the same behavior repeatedly (compulsive; ritual).

People with OCD have obsessive thoughts about the things that are most important to them. For some people cleanliness is very important for them, so they are obsessed with sanitation and are always worried about contamination and germs. For others, it might be an obsession with security, so that they are constantly preoccupied with concerns that they will be hurt or hurt others. Well, for some people, obsessive compulsive disorder can be manifested in a romantic relationship.

A person with OCD can establish a romantic relationship with others and is clearly seen from the perspective of the audience (and from the other partner) that their relationship is going well. But the person is very obsessed with making sure that they really fall in love with their partner by constantly performing his unique rituals.They will have an obsession with the relationship (remember, not an obsession with the individual boyfriend) so that they often experience thoughts that interfere with and cause pressure related to the strength of the relationship and the quality and true nature of their partners.

The form of obsession with OCD tend to be in the form of thought so that it can be difficult to detect by others. But an obsession with a partner can also be seen from the actions taken compulsively to reduce the mental stress caused by these thoughts. In addition to the talent of experiencing OCD, obsessive thinking that doubts couples can also come from misconceptions in partner figures found in media such as songs, films and novels so that they tend to have certain fictional expectations and find it difficult to accept the true nature and characteristics of their partners.

Signs and effects of OCD behavior on relationships

Repeated or compulsive behavior as a sign of someone with OCD in a relationship can be realized in various ways.People with OCD do not think about how they can build a healthy and good dating relationship with their boyfriend, but instead will always think about or doubt some things related to their partners, such as:

  • Does he deserve to be my partner? (Not arrogance to look down on others, but rather doubtfulness is overwhelming)
  • Doubt his feelings for the couple
  • Assess / compare the level of beauty / good looks of the couple
  • Questioning how much they want their partner as a sex partner
  • Questioning compatibility in the long run
  • Focusing on the lack or negative aspects of the couple
  • Comparing current relationships with before - "better" or "worse"

In general these behaviors are categorized in several groups including:

Compulsive behavior directed at couples

This can take the form of repeated actions just to find out the level of strength of the relationship, sex drive, or emotional closeness - such as having sex, telling him that he has doubts about their relationship, breaking up too often, or testing feelings by approaching or paying attention to people others and compare them with partners.

The compulsive drive of OCD can also involve strenuous efforts to check partner loyalty, such as repeatedly contacting him, checking e-mails or internet search history or constantly asking if they are serious when expressing their love.

Excessive avoidance behavior

This is an action that aims to distance yourself and feelings to your partner both verbally and physically. This behavior also alienates triggers for their partners, such as avoiding people who they consider attractive or ex-spouses who can make them feel doubtful about the relationship that is being lived.

Compulsive behavior to seek the support of others

This is done by confirming the compatibility of their relationship, the appropriateness of the couple with him by continuing to ask those around without stopping. This was done to strengthen the sufferer's confidence OCD towards the relationship.

Repeated behavior is only done to overcome the burden of mental stress due to OCD symptoms

Any excessive behavior carried out by people with OCD will have an impact, and if it occurs in a relationship it will cause misunderstandings and conflicts between partners which can lead to the end of the relationship. They also tend to feel guilty about the behavior, thoughts, and feelings they experience, but tend to be done again.

But for them, this repetition is not intentional to hurt the partner's feelings. For people with OCD, it is important to continue to perform this ritual because dating relationships are things that they consider important in their lives so even thinking about ending them can make them stressful and worse.

Repeated (compulsive) behavior is one of the symptoms of OCD which is present as a self-defense technique to avoid this mental burden, or try to reduce it. Ironically, despite the sufferer OCD inadvertently doing that, but by doing repetitive behaviors such as expressing his doubts about their relationship, he indirectly gives mental and emotional pressure to his partner.

What can be done if a partner has OCD?

If you experience similar problems,so you should make sure the OCD condition is experienced by recognizing the presence or absence of risk factors for family OCD or OCD disorders that have been experienced before. Basically obsessive compulsive disorder can be managed by doing cognitive behavioral therapy. This therapy is needed to reshape the mindset and response to obsessive thoughts about relationships or partners.

The most important thing that can be done to avoid obsessive thinking is to change the focus of things that are in mind. Recognize the conditions in which your thoughts feel most comfortable and not disturbed by obsessive thinking and focus on the things that cause them.

Continuous Dating? Maybe Your Sign Has OCD
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