Contents:
Medical Video: Dr. Phil’s Message To Anyone Stuck In An Abusive Relationship: Violence Is ‘Not An Option’
Violence against couples was referred to as domestic violence, aka Domestic Violence (KDRT), but the term that is now starting to be used more is intimate partner violence. This is largely because now more and more people are embracing the stereotype that "perpetrators of violence are always men and victims are always women" is not always true.
Intimate partner violence is any action, effort, or threat of violence or violence by an intimate family member or partner. This can be intended for yourself or your partner in that intimate relationship.
Torture can take many forms including physical, sexual, psychological, or verbal. This can include nicknames to tarnish good names, demeaning comments, or physical strength - including (and not limited to) slapping, hitting, and kicking. Intimate partner violence does not require sexual intimacy and is not exclusive to heterosexual or homosexual couples.
Why is it difficult to break away from relationshipsabusive?
No one wants to admit that they are in a relationship abusive, but acknowledging how dangerous a partner can sometimes be more difficult without physical violence. Many people ask "Why not just run away? Why does he choose to stay with that person? "- not that simple. It is important to understand that there are many obstacles to safety in relationships abusive; for example, the threat of life, financial monopoly, or fear. Leaving a partner is often dangerous and there are many factors that "victims" must consider in analyzing how to act in response to a cruel partner.
How to get out of the bondage of abusive relationships
When you begin to realize that your partner makes you feel sad more often than happy, it's time to find a way to free yourself.
1. Get to know his cruel treatment
The first line of your defense is to always demand that he stop his violent behavior. Although this sounds like a clear thing to do, many victims do not realize that they deserve to be treated with respect, and therefore do not claim their rights. Abuser Emotional aims to undermine your self-esteem and force you to feel dependent on them. Affirm your partner that you are open to hearing concerns about your actions and how they affect him, but will no longer be involved in conversations that attack who you are as a person.
Pay attention to the way your partner talks to you and times when you might feel your partner is manipulating you. Educate yourself about domestic violence and abuse. Look for words and phrases commonly found in verbal and emotional abuse, side effects of relationships abusive, “gaslighting " (psychological manipulation tactics by criminals to make the public judge themselves as weak parties), and brainwashing. Learning a little every day about how your partner manipulates and controls you reduces their ability to do it.
Also, consider what you are willing to do for him? What are you really not going to do? Make sure you adjust this request with your personal well-being and integrity. Don't agree to do simple things to just keep the peace or save the crisis, especially if you know it isn't right for you. This allows you to move forward with the next step of the place of power, not a place of fear.
If you find yourself consistently helpless before your partner, stop blaming yourself and start acknowledging the real problem. The faster you allow yourself to recognize the action abusive, the sooner you can start to find a way out.
2. Make peace with yourself
You must get rid of self-hatred. It's okay for you to see your weaknesses, but don't criticize yourself for what makes you yourself. Everyone has imperfections and nothing is perfect. Don't try to be and not put undue pressure on yourself to be someone you don't. Be honest with yourself and embrace yourself. This needs to be done before you begin to deal with stressed emotions, such as feelings of shame, fear, and anger.
Understand that to be truly free from abusive relationships involves developing healthy relationships with yourself and with others. To do this, never say anything that insults or hurts yourself. Decide to be kind and loving to yourself. Don't continue with verbal dialogue in your head that repeats or reflects whatever negative things your partner says about you.
3. Make a plan of salvation
There will be moments of joy and pleasure in relationships abusive You. Nothing forbids you to enjoy sex, praise, jokes, but don't fall asleep in the atmosphere. Don't assume that because he (finally) smiles for a while then the smile will be there in the next moment. Humans need joy in their lives, so take advantage of everything you can.
Apart from all that, you still need a plan of salvation. Someone's behavior abusive unexpected and you never know when you will have to stay away from them. Thinking about a plan of salvation during times of peace will help you to think faster and clearer in times of danger.
Find ways to reconnect with other people who support and love you for exactly who you are. Isolation is the actor's best friend. When you are isolated from others, you lose the most valuable life holdings you can have - ideas and life views from other people besides the perpetrators. The impact of abusive behavior and cruelty can be increased by only hearing the opinions of your partner, so it is good to keep in touch with the outside world:
- Contact a local women's foundation or LBH and find out how you can use their services, if necessary.
- Get help from a trusted family member, friend, colleague, or neighbor about your situation and plan a plan to escape.
- Record all incidents of violence. Note all dates, events and threats made.
- Collect evidence of physical violence, such as pictures.
- Save and hide backup vehicle lock sets.
- Set aside money. Ask friends or family members to save money for you.
- Pack bags, including what is important to you, such as identification, car papers, birth certificates, social security cards, credit cards, clothes for yourself and your children, shoes, medicine, banking information, money, and important telephone number. This will allow you to leave quickly when the situation requires.
One of the most difficult things about planning a safety plan is that it forces you to face what happens in your relationship realistically. When you honestly analyze your abusive relationship, the panic to leave immediately begins. Try to keep your anxiety under control by thinking that you have come this far and you can last a little longer while you decide whether to stay or leave.
It is very important that you keep your safety plan a secret. Be careful who you ask for your help planning your safety. Make sure the person you trust will not betray and open the secret. Even if you plan to stay, your partner will not like that you have talked to other people about what he did.
If you have experienced physical abuse, it is important to leave the relationship as soon as you can. However, the rush to go and forever is not always possible. The purpose of this safety plan is to keep you as safe as possible until you can, or decide to, permanently leave your partner.
4. Don't give a second chance
After you make the decision to leave, do it without giving hope. Ending a relationship with an "open door" will only allow the partner to continue manipulating you and bring you back into his grasp. If you have a pet or property together, make an agreement about who will retain ownership.
Take all your belongings at once, and invite a friend or family member with you if you need help making a move. State as clearly as possible to break all relationships so that your ex-spouse will not have a reason to stretch back into your life in the future.
In the end, only you can decide whether the behavior abusiveit's something you are willing to tolerate or not. A romantic relationship must be something that supports your growth, not something that threatens it. Love values who you are; not dragging you into misery. You have the right to have a strong and loving romantic relationship.
READ ALSO:
- There Are Linkages Between Porn Films and Violence Against Women
- Differences in Ways to Think about Women and Men
- Effects of Color on the Pattern of Human Behavior
