Ways to Tell Your Partner When You Have a Sex Fantasy to Try

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Most people have one, or more, sex fantasies that are deeply buried. Whether it wants to try BSDM sex like a hot film 50 Shades of Gray, roleplay doctors and patients, in crowded places, or maybe three-sex fantasies. The problem is, how to bring up the topic of "naughty" this to the couple? Even though having sexual fantasies is natural, not everyone can be roomy to receive this information. If you have established your heart to practice your sex fantasies in the real world, but still confused how to convey it to him, consider the following tips.

How to tell your partner that you have a sex fantasy you want to try on your bed

Sharing sexual fantasies with a partner can be a positive experience. You don't have to be silent. By sharing your biggest secret, he will feel special to be the first person to know it. It's not impossible that the dipper will greet. Follow these steps and slowly begin to bring them into the wildest realm in your mind.

1. Realize that your sex fantasy is normal

There is an assumption that sexual fantasy is a forbidden thing, a disgrace, which can separate the distance between partners. Not so if you know how to deliver it. Before exposing your secrets to others, you must first feel comfortable with yourself. Because, you are responsible for introducing your wild fantasies to your partner.

If you are able to accept that your dream is normal and can convey it with confidence, your partner will be more receptive to your open arms for further exploration. It is also your confidence that might also "invite" him to tell his own sex fantasies, which he may have been harboring - just like you are now.

2. Lift this topic when you are alone

Sharing secret sexual desire with your partner can increase mutual trust and household intimacy. For this reason, if you want to explore something completely new in your relationship, such as sex with an eye patch and a hand tie or making love in a mall toilet, talk frankly with your partner when you're alone so he will understand your feelings. For example, after dinner at home when you are both relaxing.

You can start it like, "Oh, by the way, last night I dreamed that I was taken hostage by a policeman who looked like you while he forced me to give him blowjob in the elevator containing lots of people. Wake up, I am wet."Or, using the example of someone else (not necessarily the real person), for example" My friend told me that he and his girlfriend had sex in the parking lot. Really crazy, huh? What do you know about it? But later I also thought about it ... "

Threesome fantasy (source: shutterstock)

With a seductive intro like this, it's likely that your partner will be awakened by his instincts to further stimulate you.

But one word of caution if your taste is more extreme, for example, want to try anal husbanding with an artificial penis (known as pegging). Whatever you do, don't "surprise" him by just telling you what your fantasy fantasy is without warning.

3. Give instructions through humor

If you are known as a person of high sense of humor, this is the best time to use your skills. Humor not only can help you get out of awkward situations, it also makes it easier for you to talk about sensitive things like sex fantasies.

For example, like this: You have a hot sex fantasy that involves hitting your buttocks with a whip, tying your hands together and not closing your eyes with a tie. Well, when he is busy asking for this and that to you, chuckle too late with a tone of joke but tempting, like "How do you punish me if I don't make tea for you? Here, just hit my butt. "The he might first be wide-eyed in surprise. But you can argue casually with, "Joking with ..."Now for the next, you can again raise the topic kink or your fetish more relaxed.

4. Show what your kink / fetish is through the example of pop culture

In a way, everything you imagine is available in a lot of literature, ranging from adult magazines, naughty strip comics, stencil novels, to Hollywood films. Examples of the most popular and overtly discussing sex fantasies, fetishes, and kink are the trilogy of 50 Shades of Gray, if you think showing porn videos to him is too extreme.

You can invite your partner to start checking the waves through these choices. Invite to watch 50 Shades, for example, and open a chat by discussing the film. Ask how he feels after watching it, and tell him some scene the heat in the film makes you hot, and you want to try it together.

Unconsciously, this follows the principle of social influence. People tend to choose to follow and imitate what they see other people doing (especially when people enjoy it). So, showing or discussing positive examples of "other people also doing that, how come" about what you want will make your partner more interested and agree.

5. Slow down

When you introduce your partner to your sex or fetish fantasies, start clearly but slowly. Don't rush to buy and show off whip, handcuffs, and latex costumes on your body for the night session later. Start one by one, but surely.

In the middle of the lovemaking session, try to whisper to him your desire to make love to three: "You know what I'm imagining right now, and make me very aroused? There is another woman who licks my vagina when you enter it from behind. "

BDSM sex
Fantasy sex bondage (source: shutterstock)

Maybe he will not immediately invite other people to join in other times you make love. But, when it is aroused, someone will be far more suggestive and more open to things (That's why making decisions when you're excited is an inappropriate step.)

So be patient. Referring to your sex fantasies occasionally at the right moments as instructions to act. First, invite him to buy fur handcuffs and use them on the right night. Then repay the rest of your fantasy over time until you get the whole thing.

Starting slowly will give your partner time to get used to, adjust, and feel comfortable with the new atmosphere. This will also make it easier for you to say the word "yes" to explore any other wild ideas that you offer.

Ways to Tell Your Partner When You Have a Sex Fantasy to Try
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