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Medical Video: How my mom’s breast cancer diagnosis affected our family
- Plan a conversation at the beginning
Decide what you will say and how you will deliver it. This will give you an idea of the conversation. Involve your partner or other adults that your child believes if you think his presence will help.
- Use straightforward, simple language to explain the meaning of cancer, affected body parts, and treatment.
Experts agree that mentioning the name of the disease is important. "Cancer" should not be a forbidden word. Even children can catch a simple explanation about cancer cells. You might also explain that the doctor needs to lift your breast that has cancer, and then use strong drugs to make sure that the cancer is gone from your body.
- Make sure your child knows that cancer is not caused by them, and they cannot get it.
Younger children often think of themselves as the center of the world. They may worry that your cancer is their fault or they do something that causes cancer. Children also tend to associate illness with flu or contract germs. Be sure to explain that cancer is not contagious.
- Tell your child how cancer treatment will affect you
Prepare them to find out the side effects of cancer treatment on your physical, such as breast loss, hair loss due to chemotherapy, or feeling sick or tired. You might need to explain that drugs for cancer show that cancer drugs work in your body. Tell children that you may feel sad, angry, or tired, but this feeling is not their fault. Always let your child know why you go to the hospital or visit a doctor.
- Assure your child that their needs will be fulfilled
Experts agree that children need to be convinced and still have a consistent routine. Let your children know that you may not always be there to accompany them to school activities, play with them, or prepare their food. Carrying and bathing them may not be possible in the meantime. Let them know that trusted family members, relatives, or babysitters will help them until you feel stronger again.
- Maintain the routine as usual
Receiving an unpleasant diagnosis often makes many families feel they can forget the usual rules and routines. Children are left to watch TV for longer, play computer games, or buy more toys. However, maintaining the same routine will further convince your child that your condition is only temporary and will not change them drastically. Be sure to keep your usual routine.
- Invite your child to ask questions and learn more
Let children know that you can answer their questions about cancer and your condition. If your children are mature enough, you might consider taking them to one of the doctor's visits or visits during treatment, if possible. This can help to eliminate some of the mysteries surrounding cancer and its treatment.
- Let your child know that you will still have time to accompany them
Take special time just for them. Simple activities like reading a book or watching a movie together can help them know that you are still there for them, even when you are tired or not feeling well.
- Try to stay optimistic without making an appointment
Even if you are sad or scared, try to keep speaking in a positive tone while having a dialogue with your child. Children may feel fear if you appear too anxious or emotional. Make sure they know that doctors and nurses are doing everything they can for you and that most people with breast cancer have better conditions. Convince them without making promises about the future that you cannot necessarily fulfill.
- Tell the teacher and counselor at school about what is happening
Other trusted adults who spend time with your child need to know about this diagnosis. Changes in the home often cause changes in the behavior of children in the surrounding environment. Adults can help you find out how your child is developing at school, and they can be a source of additional care and support.
