Contents:
- Medical Video: Why domestic violence victims don't leave | Leslie Morgan Steiner
- Domestic violence is a cycle of violence
- Reasons for victims of domestic violence persist in relationships abusive
- 1. Embarrassed
- 2. Feel guilty
- 3. Threatened
- 4. Economic dependence
- 5. Social or spiritual pressure
- 6. Already have children
- 7. Depression
Medical Video: Why domestic violence victims don't leave | Leslie Morgan Steiner
"What is wrong with him not just separate from her husband? "Maybe this is your comment when you hear the news that someone is a victim of domestic violence (domestic violence).
For people who have never experienced domestic violence, it is difficult to understand why most victims still want to live with their partners abusive or cruel. Even though knowing the reasons for victims of domestic violence survives in their violent marriages, you can help those closest to the snares of violence.
Domestic violence is a cycle of violence
Domestic violence victims survive relationships or violent marriages in the hope that their situation will improve someday. According to a psychologist and inventor of the social cycle of violence, Lenore E. Walker, domestic violence is a predictable pattern.
That is, cases of violence occur following a recurring cycle. This cycle starts from the emergence of problems in relationships, such as financial problems or child quarrels. Usually at this stage the victim tries to improve the situation by succumbing to or following the wishes of his partner.
If the effort fails, enter the second stage, namely violence. In this stage the perpetrator will torture or oppress the victim as punishment or emotional exertion. The victim may unconsciously think that he really deserves this reward because he failed to solve the problem.
After being satisfied with committing violence, the perpetrator feels guilty and apologizes to the victim. The perpetrator may give a gift, flirt with sweet words, or promise the victim will not repeat the action again. In some cases, the perpetrators actually pretended not to know, as if the violence had never occurred. This stage is known as the honeymoon.
Then enter the fourth stage, namely calm. Usually the victim and the offender will go through the days like a partner in general. They may eat together or have sex as usual. However, when a problem arises, the couple will enter the first stage again. As it continues, this cycle will spin without stopping.
Reasons for victims of domestic violence persist in relationships abusive
Up to this point you might be surprised, what makes the victim feel at home trapped in such a terrifying cycle. According to experts, there are seven main reasons.
1. Embarrassed
Domestic violence victims survive because they feel divorce or separation will be a disgrace to him. Especially if people know their partner is cruel. He was actually embarrassed because he failed to maintain the harmony of his household.
2. Feel guilty
There are also victims who feel guilty if they leave their partners. He even felt that his partner's tantrums and cruelty were actually caused by his own actions. For example, a wife feels she deserves to be beaten by her husband because she came home late without permission. This wrong thought is actually a victim's defense mechanism so that he is not too stressed.
3. Threatened
Actors might threaten to kill, hurt, or interfere with the lives of victims and their families if they are determined to leave the perpetrators. Because of the fear of the threat, victims find it difficult to think clearly, especially until they seek help.
4. Economic dependence
Many victims of domestic violence survive because they are financially dependent on the perpetrators. The victim was afraid that if he left the perpetrator, he would not be able to support himself or his children.
5. Social or spiritual pressure
Women victims of domestic violence often get social or spiritual pressure to survive in their marriages even though they are full of violence. Because, in certain cultures or religions women must obey their husbands. The victim who swallows raw value will then believe that it is appropriate for him to keep obeying her husband.
6. Already have children
Domestic violence victims may not want to leave their marriage because they think about the child's future. He was afraid that divorce or separation would make the fate of children become uncertain. For the good of the child, he chose to survive.
7. Depression
Depression that attacks victims of domestic violence makes them unable to act, defend themselves, let alone leave their partners. Perpetrators also usually curb victims so victims cannot seek help from family, police, or protective foundations of victims of violence. As a result, victims become increasingly isolated and have no other choice.
