Contents:
- Medical Video: 11 Things Happy Couples Do Before They Go to Sleep
- Don't say "no more" when fighting with a partner
- Talk about all problems with your partner
Medical Video: 11 Things Happy Couples Do Before They Go to Sleep
When fighting or fighting arguments with your partner, you may often unconsciously issue negative words to him. Of course all this because of the overwhelming emotions at that time. However, there are a few words that you should not say to your partner when fighting, or if your relationship and partner are on the edge. What words should not be said?
Don't say "no more" when fighting with a partner
According to Dan Neuharth, PhD, marriage and family therapist, the words "will no longer" can backfire for relationships. For example, when you and your partner have a problem, then you silently mumble "I will no longer depend on you", "I will no longer let myself believe too much in his words", and a number of other sentences.
Most people swear by saying "no more" in conditions that they are not aware of and enveloped in emotion. When you overcome disappointment by protecting yourself with such promises, you will usually save anger to stay there and choose not to solve it.
You will be silent and keep it tight without talking about it with your partner. Maybe you don't realize it but these words will fill your mind which can permanently damage your relationship and your partner.
However, it needs to be understood that the word "will no longer" is not intended to be a rough relationship where you are a victim. Instead, you must say the word "no more" if you are in a relationship like that. You must say "I will no longer allow myself to be tortured by him."
Neuharth said the word "will no longer" is intended for people who always use the word when even trivial problems can actually be solved.
Based on the case of the patient he has handled, the power of the word "will no longer" has a great effect on the relationship. Usually, parties who feel victimized will save it for years and actually make the problem never resolved, leading to separation.
Talk about all problems with your partner
Neuharth states the first step you need to do when having a problem is not to protect yourself with the word "will no longer" but instead discuss it openly. Tell your partner about your views on the problem and how you feel.
It's not easy, maybe your partner will actually behave like defending himself and don't want to know your feelings. However, convince your partner that what you are doing is a way to make the relationship better.
When you agree to have a relationship, you and your partner should reduce their egos and make "me and you" become "us". So that all problems that come are resolved for the purpose of mutual happiness. Remember, every problem that comes cannot be resolved on its own without any settlement from both parties.
Eliminate the toxic thoughts in mind. The word "will no longer" become one of the poisons that can make relationships unhealthy. Instead, instill in yourself that the most important thing that you should start growing is good communication to avoid unhealthy relationships.
Honest and open communication can improve relationships that may have been damaged. Talking about each other's opinions and feelings when experiencing problems can make you and your partner understand that a good relationship needs to be sought.
Think of problems as lessons and tests to strengthen your relationship and your partner. So compared to saying "Will no longer" it would be far better for you to encourage yourself with "Let's try again".
