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Facing your mother or father-in-law who often criticizes or insinuates you is not an easy matter. Especially if the words hurt your feelings. But don't let the emotions become blinded so that you explode and end up fighting. The atmosphere in the house becomes tense and uncomfortable, right?
Facing a mother who likes to insinuate or criticize children needs special tactics. Come on, see the following tips.
Tips for dealing with mothers who like to criticize children
Parents who often give scathing criticism to children from an early age turned out to have a negative impact on their mental health to adulthood.
Parenting like this can make children increasingly not listen to the words of parents or even encourage them to behave obsessively (doing things repeatedly to avoid anxiety). Yes, this condition is also known as obsessive compulsive disorder.
If you are an adult and find your mother or father-in-law often gives scathing criticism, the right way to deal with it is to strengthen the bond between you and the mother. Not just ignoring it.
There are several steps you need to take to deal with this situation, including:
1. Try telling your mother about her attitude
Honest and open communication is the key to having a good relationship. Behind the behavior of your mother who is often nosy, actually she really cares about you. Unfortunately he doesn't realize that his caring for you is very excessive.
In order for him to change, you need to discuss his attitude that often criticizes children. This is better done than you harbor emotions that ultimately upset you and ultimately hurt your mother. Not that the atmosphere is cool, what is there is even more murky.
So, express your desires gently, calmly and honestly. Choose the appropriate time and support to discuss this.
2. Set limits on the extent to which mothers may interfere
Mothers who like to comment usually tend to often interfere in your business. When you are an adult, you learn to live independently, including in deciding a choice. Although consideration of parents and people near you is needed, you must be able to choose the best.
In order for your mother not to cross the line, it is necessary to determine the extent to which your mother may interfere. don't overflow to explain your intentions by setting these limits clearly and softly. Remember, respecting each other's privacy can keep your relationship and your mother healthy.
3. Prepare special time to spend with your mother
The attitude of your mother who continues to grumble, can be a signal that your mother wants to be noticed. However, your mother is embarrassed or reluctant to express it.
You certainly understand that as you get older, the activities carried out by your mother diminish and feel lonely. While you become more busy. That is why your mother deliberately continues to chatter about this and that.
The solution, you only need to spend time with your mother. For example, asking him to make cakes together, prepare dinner at home, go shopping, or just do morning exercise together.
Not only pleases your mother, spending time together can strengthen the relationship of children and mothers become stronger.
4. Ask for help from a psychologist
If the previous method is not effective in making your relationship and your mother better, you should seek the help of a psychologist. You need to get counseling from a psychologist to learn how to deal with mothers who often criticize children.
You might need help from other family members to create a healthy bond between you and your mother.